Sit Under It
September 3rd, 2007Of the few things I feel I have begun to learn in the last year, one of the most profound to me has been this: It is ok to suffer. It ok to be in the midst of pain and hurt and to simply sit under it. I (and you) do not have to push the everything is fine appearance all the time. I have discovered that covering up pain and burying it can be altogether much more detrimental to my soul in the long run. And because of this, I must not only accept pain, but in some way embrace it.
true.
i think the reality of the human state in contrast to the beauty of Christian spirituality is one of the most compelling aspects of the gospel.
who are we to try to hide it?
Yes.
Many Christians (me included!) associate suffering with punishment or the ever popular question, “Why me?”
Yet, I think a better question to ask is if God didn’t withhold (EXTREME) pain and suffering from his Son, what makes us think that we won’t or shouldn’t encounter it as well?
Thanks for openly and honestly sharing your thoughts.
A friend and I sat at a coffee shop and talked for a few hours yesterday…and we got to this very topic. Sometimes when we do openly show our pain, others add insult to injury by saying they have it worse…somehow discounting our own pain.
We came to the conclusion that telling someone their state of pain and suffering is not as bad as ours is denying that they are human. It’s the human condition, and brokeness is a common factor in our existence. We are all fallen.
Good words, Josh.
God has been teaching me the same things for the past 10 months - it all comes down to honesty.
honesty has been a big word in my life recently.
i once read somewhere that every decision to lie contains the question, “am i trusting God or myself to handle this?” because when we lie we’re basically telling God, “i’m calling the shots in my life.”
i believe that not just being an honest person, but LIVING IN honesty is a way in which we can embrace our pain.
this post reminds me of a song by an amazing band called Between The Trees, the song is called A Time For Yohe. it’s about sitting under the pain and not having to always have life all put together. here’s the lyrics…
As she sits in the corner
face to the floor
she dispels smoke from from her lips
and slowly floats away with it
letting go of so much pain
her tears are thick enough to stain
the pavement that slowly becomes
her best friend when she needs to run away
This is your time to weep
This is your time to morn
Not yet time to build up
Just a time to tear down
old walls
Does it help to say I’m sorry
If so than I’m sorry that your so unhappy
This life those lies are starting get you down
Darling don’t let them drag you around
Saying “it’s my fault” doesn’t help repeated
Time, love, and Jesus seems to beat it
She’ll find out this is harder than
Taking medicine
This is your time to weep
This is your time to morn
Not yet time to build up
Just a time to tear down
old walls
We’re still waiting for the fire
Seeing smoke and waiting for the fire
Yes! Yes! Yes!
This is so true. I have always been one to wear my every emotion on my sleeve. Good, bad, painful, and inbetween. When it comes to the bad, I always feel like I heal faster when I acknowledge and even embrace the pain. It is actually cleansing to “sit under it”, as you said.
Wonderfully honest post.
Amen.
I feel as if this entire summer for me has been a lesson in struggles and embracing pain. Not just for the sake of being real with self, but becoming real, in realization that it is the only opportunity for growth, honesty, humility, and so many other things that I fight. I had forgotten about that beautiful truth in the Velveteen Rabbit which fits so well. Thanks for the post, I hope we can talk about it sometime.
truth.
and so we come alongside those who suffer.
Joshua - I enjoyed your cross-country chronicles. Welcome to Seattle. Good luck in school. A new place is stressful enough let alone beginning grad school. I appreciate your comments in this post. I work to embrace those same sentiments myself but at times, it is hard. You are in good hands at MH.
When it comes to the relatively small amount of pain I’ve dealt with in my life and the vast amounts of it I’ve encounted with my friends, I’ve come to one conclusion.
Pain shapes us. Covering (or burying)a wound does not bring healing.
May you be shaped by what you are choosing to endure today.
it’s difficult to actually let that “fine” facade down when you’re in a position of church leadership.
i remember being overwhelmed at one point last year, just weighed down by life and my own flesh. i didn’t despise it, or God, or blame anyone. but it felt like i needed to confess, to allow someone else to know i was fighting. to ask for help, or at least let another lend a shoulder to it.
i remember vaguely reading a story of a spiritually dead church, when during prayer, a congregant began pouring his heart out, confessing long-held bitterness and sin. this prompted a moment of honesty among the rest of that church, people weeping with one another, confessing their hatred and jealousy, and asking forgiveness of one another. beautiful story.
i remember wanting the same sort of moment, to just let the junk out, and trust God and the people i call family enough to be that transparent. shortly after, i began hearing messages about those in ministry keeping as much of themselves out of their work or ‘presentation’ as possible.
on the one hand, i want to be more authentic. on the other- i really don’t want my words or my worship to be… ‘flavored’ by ME. at least as little as possible. but then again, if i don’t get the internal taken care of, the external will mirror it, be tainted by it… but if my sin or struggle is exposed- that will taint whatever i bring, as people will be more focused upon what i’m dealing with than what God’s bringing through me…
seems like a catch-22. and i’m not trying to make what you’ve written, Josh, about my little issue here. i agree with your heart on the matter completely. i just wonder if it’s not… almost required for some to cover it up and bury it.
yes
thanks for being transparent joshua.
amen. thanks for that encouragement.
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